build your beautiful self

Today was an interesting experience in a stress that I haven’t felt in a while. I had a deal that was going well so far up to this week. I had to overcome things that were outside of my control, and let go of the suffering I was causing myself over stressing about the situation.

I got a lesson in preparation and double checking my work today. I checked on this particular thing the evening before. What I needed still wasn’t there so I put it on my morning to do list. I had everything going along smoothly, until my hiccup. I did what I thought was the right thing, but what I didn’t do was read the terms and conditions of this website and its services.

I thought it would be easy as pie, but the urgency in which I needed the issues resolved was, in no way going to be met. Bring in the desperation. RIght on que. All the stress bubbles of all that had been building up came out at that point. All it took was 5 minutes of checking and I would have not had to deal with any of the stress. Chaos was added as the stress tension was rising and not thinking clearly enough to come up with a solid plan on corrective action.

As I sat on the phone with the rep, I was trying to get her to give me a solution. I was getting so frustrated with the answers she was giving to me and she was showing it to me in her responses to me. There were 2 options on how to fix it and neither were good. I hung up the phone exhausted, defeated, and plain….OVERWHELMED!

I ended up sobbing as I was explaining to my love what had happened. I couldn’t contain it. I was so emotionally exhausted and stressed the F out!I ended up crying for about 30 more minutes here and there, but I came to the conclusion that I needed to take the steps needed to get to the better of the two terrible options I have.

It helped me to express what I was feeling and come to the root of the emotional overload. I found a few answers and felt slightly better. Crying was the key I supposed. To let out all the suckiness with each tear really soothes the soul and allows you to figure out what the hell happened and what you can do to not allow it to happen to you again.

Sometimes a cry is just a cry that was needed to wash the stress away.

Cheers.