build your beautiful self

I woke up this morning early and had a tough time falling back asleep. I decided to get out of bed. I went to my kitchen to grab the cup of joe that I love, look out my window and see a tree has broken off and damaged my fence. I think to myself, I wonder if my insurance will cover the repairs, did I have a clause in there for my fence, I wonder if they will only fix the damaged section or if they would fix the whole fence…The thoughts linger on as I watch the damage only to see that nothing moved. I hear my coffee complete its’ brew and move over to a more comfortable spot vowing to take care of it after I have a few moments of sitting and reflecting, drinking coffee and wondering what the world is up to.

I take a few more sips of coffee and pop open the ever faithful view into my friend’s worlds. I scroll down to find out one of the lights in this world has gone out. I found out a week or so ago that my friend, Dong AKA Fabio King had passed after his very brief struggle with Liver cancer.

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It is extremely hard to first imagine he is not in this world anymore, and second my thoughts drift to our many conversations over manicures. Although I didn’t spend a ton of time with him outside the nail salon, our sessions were filled with many conversations. I knew more about him however because he opened up when we spoke.

I first met him at the bar up the road from my house. I went outside and he was sitting with one of his friends while they were smoking and he struck up a conversation with me. Asked for my name and proceeded to chat about his and many other nonsensical items. He was such a light spirit that was my pleasure to speak with. I asked what he did for a living because I am a constant networker. He told me that he did nails, showed me his manicure that he had on and handed me a card.

About a month later I decided to check out the place he worked and while he was there, he was busy with another client so I got my nails done by one of the ladies. He remembered my name, however, which fascinated me because I have to work really hard at names and sometimes have to ask again at our second meeting. He remembered mine with ease and he was drinking when we met! We chatted and he entertained. He was always moving. He couldn’t just sit quietly and do nails like most other technicians. He was loud and boisterous and fun and engaging. Always the entertainer. He was put here to make people smile.

He eventually gave me his cell so I could text him to make appointments. I made appointments through him after that. Session after session we talked about his life and where he wanted to go. He always asked me for advice and gave me some of his own on what he thought of various topics. After a couple of years of meetings we talked about him getting a real estate license. We chatted about that many times. He always told me he was looking for more ways to support his mother who lived with him full time. He said nails didn’t cut it income wise and he was trying to get a dj business off the ground as well.

We had long talks after he got his license. He made sure to fit me in for a nail do when I asked because he knew I was busy, but the talks we had were very important as I sit and reflect on them.

I also hired him to work an event. He was pulling people off the street to bring them in! He was fun and funny and super nerdy with all his props but you can’t help but love that quality about him. He said he wanted to buy new speakers at one point so I paid him more than we agreed upon so he could do that.  He sent me the photo of the new speakers a week later and was so grateful. It made my heart happy.

There were times when our conversations were light hearted and he was happy. There were other times when our conversations were on the consoling side. There were so many dreams he had and he was trying to figure out a way to make all them happen and I was trying to get him as much help as I could.

I know in the last couple of posts, there has been some frustration in my text. Sometimes we all go through our own shit and have to vent it to someone. I never think that I don’t have tomorrow however. I feel like a part of him was saying to all he knew and touched that tomorrow is never promised. While I know that he left an impression on the world, did many good things and had so many people who loved him, I know he had unfulfilled dreams.

This is the 2nd person in a relatively short time that was lost to cancer at way too young of an age. It wasn’t a long progression either. My husband’s cousin fought for a couple of months after they found out she had cancer. Fabio died in less than a month, both near the 30 year mark of their life. Just getting into their life prime!

As a reflection on this event that has really saddened me, it is also a reminder that life can be way shorter than you think. You could be strumming along fine in life trying to figure out where to go next, what to do next, and bam, you have cancer and choices are now limited. I am sad for my friend. It pains me to think about him passing and I am reveling in that pain right now because there are many things that I have yet to accomplish and I could be next, or you could be next. We are never guaranteed tomorrow it seems even though we think it will come.

I know now that I have a ton of work to do. I need to impact more lives than I currently am because that is what makes me truly happy. I need to work harder on my self love and love of my family. I need to get back to the joy in life so I don’t ever feel like I missed out on one second of my life. I want you to pick up this message that my good friend Dong left on me and all the other people he touched with his spirit. Be a light for someone, make them feel special. I have fallen to the wayside and gotten stuck in my own head, my own issues, my own pains, and my own worries. I forgot that things like this happen to the wrong people and their light is put out too soon.

Seeing all the love on the man’s page is heartwarming and heartbreaking at the same time because all of those people will not get to experience the warmth that he brought into this world again.

We need to work hard at making this world better. Stop tearing each other down, but work to build others up!

Live on in light and love Dong “Fabio” King. You have touched my spirit and so many others that you were truly an angel put on this earth for a too short minute, but your pineapple pen song and dance will forever remain in my heart.  ❤