build your beautiful self

Ok so it is the day after the 14 year anniversary of Sept 11^th. People spent all day yesterday remembering where they were, what happened, loved ones lost and so on. This is a wonderful thing, but take a look at the news…Do you think on any other day, we as Americans, remember this? We are so busy fighting each other and helping every other country but our own, that we don’t take a look and remember the tragedies that happened a little over a decade ago or the tragedies that happen on a daily basis in our great country. This disgusts me enough to make me write an article about making a difference. There were so many people who made a difference in people’s lives in Manhattan that day that never again will be able to enjoy the simple things that all of us reading this get to enjoy on a daily basis.

Bringing Selfish Joy

There is nothing in this world that makes me happier then to help the ones I love and strangers in their time of need. It may be a selfish pursuit but it is also a selfless one at the same time. Almost 2 years ago I went to a weekend retreat with the Lifeonaire group. One of the main points of the retreat is finding your life’s vision. The exercises that you go through over that 3 day period are emotional and difficult because it allows you to take a step back, look at where you are now, where you are lacking and asking yourself if you are really living your true passion. It is an emotional rollercoaster in a great way. By the end of it, you reconnect with the true inner YOU! You see what you lack in life, see what you are completely passionate about and come out with a plan to take massive action in your life!

I went through the exercises, the emotions, the tears and the new found faith and passion to live the life I wanted to live for me and my family.

Now here is the kicker – I came back, took massive action, had my vision in place, worked toward my vision with all my heart and soul, and then the setbacks and missed opportunity set in. In short – my selfishness stepped in again. I was completely consumed and focused on my goals that I truly forgot about the most important things! Talk about a depressed state of mind! I was pushing and pushing and on the brink of complete life burnout! This is where I started searching again for what truly brings me joy! The most selfish and selfless kind of joy is really what I was after.

In walks the breakthrough! I am really good at certain things! I am good at helping people in need, coaching people through difficult situations and new endeavors, and sharing my lessons in life with others.

Searching through the mess of thoughts, I found that the things I am good at really bring me great joy in life! I am happiest when I am successful with bringing others success or even just the feeling of hope and thankfulness knowing that at least one person cares enough to help when the need it most. Really being there for people and seeing the gratitude when the load of whatever they are dealing with is a little bit lighter because I was there for them. This is my selfish joy. I truly don’t believe that there is enough of this in the world and daily life. I, by no means, think that I can change the entire world, but if I can change the world in one person’s life at time, my selfish needs are fulfilled!

I believe that most people deep down are brought up by helping others and that not enough people step up to the plate and help! I see this in my real estate business all the time! There are people that reach out to the seasoned business people for help. They state that they are new in the industry and are looking for a mentor or someone to show them the ropes. So many of the seasoned individuals are open to helping and teaching as long as it benefits them in some way, which is NOT the selfish joy I am talking about here. “Sure, you can come and market for me and I will teach you about it when we get the leads,” “Sure, just hang your license with me and I will give you training.” There are always the basics that are taught, that you can learn anywhere, but they always hold back the things that make them truly successful! I have not encountered very many people who really give the goods knowing that there is plenty of business in the world to be had and why not share!

If those that suppress their desire to help would open up to the possibility that helping others boosts their business, I am sure it would be a friendlier realm of business. I, on the other hand, am not afraid to be vulnerable and not afraid to tell people the truth. If someone can learn from the mistakes I had made or the lessons I learned and jump start their business faster, then it makes me happy!

I am fortunate enough to have found the company that truly lets me help people with genuine commitment. I also am reworking my vision to add more positive things back in my life. I have realized that I have stepped away from the thing that made me passionate about life and what it has done in and to my life. It may take some time to progress in a way that I am hoping but it all starts with baby steps. This blog is a good place to start. I can get it out there and maybe someone else reading this is in the same spot! I plan to take my friend dinner this afternoon and hopefully brighten her day a little. I am going to pick up the phone and connect with a couple of people I have been meaning to call and check on but have been so preoccupied that I haven’t. Little steps toward big reward are my goal!

Back to the selfish joy for me! How about you?